Gallbladder surgery

Sunday night I was in extreme pain. This pain had been going on for about 8 days, and felt like my liver. I was told I had mono, and so thought my liver was just swollen. But the pain wouldn't go away, kept me up all night, and was no where near my spleen- which is usually what gets inflamed first and the worst in mono. So I called the on call dr. and he said to go to the ER. They did tests and an ultrasound and gave me morphine- which I had a reaction to so it wasn't really super helpful. We got there at 7:30pm and I got to my room to stay over in the hospital at 1:00am. I didn't sleep because I was nervous and dad had to go home so he could work in the morning. My boyfriend is in Idaho and so it was very scary and lonely. Luckily for valentines day he gave me a big pink stuffed puppy, so of course I slept clinging tightly to that. Then they did more blood tests, the surgeon cam and said I would have surgery and they were going to take out my gallbladder. I was in a lot of pain, but since I hadn't been eating because I might have surgery it was ok. When I would eat my gallbladder would freak out. So then mom and dad tried to make it in time for the surgery, which they kept moving up. BUt both my parents got there and it was very nice waiting to go in. The anesthesiologist was LDs so he was very nice and we chatted for a bit. Then I got nervous as they took me back and can't remember very much except being somewhat awake asking to make cupcakes and eating pot roast for dinner. But I kept falling asleep while eating so it wasn't very good. I don't know how or when I got back to my room, but my parents were there, and i just remember them laughing a lot. They told me I should call Shon, so I did but I fell asleep on the phone with him 3 times and I have no idea what I said. So I tried to call him later that night and did a little better but for some reason starting telling him all about taxes. His family came to visit and i got to see the new baby! I even got to hold him! So apparently I'm very funny on anesthesia, which is too bad that my parents didn't record any of it! Yesterday I did better, but was in a lot of weird pain. They let me go home so my friend Holly came to get me and brought her baby too, and he is so cute and handsome! Anyway they said my gallbladder was full of sludge which mean I had passed a stone and my gallbladder was failing to work properly and everything was all backed up. They didn't take any pictures or show me what it looked like which is too bad, but at least it's out!! I have a sweet bruise underneath my belly button in the shape of a Y which is perfect since I went to BYU!!! go cougars!! haha so it was quite an adventure! I will be missing school and work all this week, but it's nice to finally be home and on the mend!! the one sad thing is that i'm not allowed to eat dairy for a while, and if I'm ready to I can only have small amounts. boo! ice cream is my all time favorite food!!!

Some of my poems

It felt so lonely,
who could I talk to?
Had god stopped hearing me?
No, he was there,
always listening, always protecting,
always weeping with me.
And God gave me the
courage
to escape.
He gave me the strength
I needed. He gave me
life.
He kept me from leaving
the earth, he gave me
HOPE.
He never left me,
he will always be there,
he will always listen,
he will always

heal.





We all need attention
from others
to survive.
Without it, we die.




Wearing red nail polish
screams
to the world, I am fierce,
don't mess with me,
I am one sassy lady.
It's like wearing your
personality
on ten little ends,
so everyone will know
before they talk to you.
You mean business.
Too bad my big,
curly hair
gives it all away
before anyone gets
close enough
to understand the signal
of my red nails.

Acceptance Speech

So I was invited to interview at Midwestern University for the PA program. If you are offered an interview it means you are basically accepted, they just want to make sure you are as nice as you made yourself sound on the application.

But after lots of praying and fasting about if PA school was the right choice for me, I got a very intense no. Heavenly Father definitely knows that I need big answers so I can remember how the prompting felt if I get stressed. Because I stress, all the time! So it's been a very exciting and spiritual weekend for me! I canceled my interview and withdrew my application this morning. I also sent them a thank you note because it really meant so much to me that I could have done it! So here is a speech I would like to share, it's almost as if I won a grammy or something. But seriously, it feels so good to have made it and know I could have done it, but that I'm choosing something better for me that the Lord has in store.

I would like to thank all of my family members who have offered their advice and love and support. Particularly my mom and dad and sister. they have listened to me weigh all the options, helped me figure out what I really want, and loved me through it all. i would like to thank my friends for believing in me and helping me re-gain my confidence in myself. I would like to thank my wonderful man for supporting me with whatever I decided, even though PA school would have been a challenge. And most importantly I would like to thank the Lord for giving me the courage and the strength to do so well in school despite the difficult situations I was in. And For never giving up on me, even when I almost gave up on Him. I am so grateful for the opportunity to fast and receive personal revelation through fasting and prayer. I know that the Lord loves each of us, and that His plan will provide so much more happiness than anything I could have thought of. My life is so wonderful, and I am so blessed. I am taking this wonderful experience and letting it finish off a sadness and void, and moving on to the next great adventure of a Masters Program. Thank you to all my teachers and doctors and friends who believed in me, who knew I could be what I wanted and helped me see that. Thank you for believing in me.