So much has happened

Hello! So much has happened since I last wrote, sorry! I almost forgot I even had one! We've had so much excitement here at home that the days have flown by!

So we finally got our foster license to care for disabled children! A week later we got twins! Due to several laws we aren't allowed to tell you any real details about them or their history, or post pictures of them, so I'll try to give you as much info and tell you how exciting everything has been!!

For privacy reasons we call them Squash and Spud. Squash is super chunky and when he sits on you, he squashes you! its really adorable actually. Spud looks like a super cute little sweet potato spud, he's a bit teeny and adorable. we think they are identical, but one is definitely heavier than the other!

When we first got them it was mid October, they had just turned 1. They love each other very much which was clear right away! We tried to have them sleep in different cribs but in the same room, but they were so happy to be together that they just talked and talked all night and wouldn't sleep!

Now they each have their own room and everyone has spoiled them with clothes and toys galore! And they most definitely got spoiled this Christmas! Some of their favorite things to do are eat, crawl over each other and bulldoze when convenient, and put everything in their mouths. Spud is super picky with food but in a weird way, he loves fruits and veggies, but doesn't like meat at all or anything even slightly warm!

The Chunky one loves all food, and getting kisses. if you say to either of them "Can I have a kiss?" they will lean in and kiss you! Squash tends to lick you more than give a tiny kiss but its really adorable. They both can clap now, drink out of sippy cups, and pull to standing. They are great at crawling, which we didn't expect so we had to completely re-do our living room to be baby safe!

They are super adorable and very happy. They like to go on walks and on drives, but if you stop for any reason they aren't happy standing still. And in the car they want to hear music on the radio, if they can't hear it they get very grumpy.

We love having them! It has been so fun to be a mommy! Ken is an amazing dad! It has been so fun! We took them to see the Mesa temple Christmas lights, and they liked that a lot. Ken and I were sealed at the Mesa temple on the 14th, which was the best day of our lives! We love the gospel and are so happy to be sealed! That means Ken and I are married for this life and all through heaven!

We loved watching general conference and hearing the Prophet Thomas S Monson speak! And my parents gave us a very beautiful picture of Jesus the Christ that they decorated themselves! You can learn more about the temple and the Gospel at lds.org or Mormon.org.

If you are interested in learning more about foster care, message me or look up our agency! We love them and have had such a great experience getting trained and licensed and now having such beautiful babies! our agency is "All in the Family". they do both regular foster care and disability foster care.

I'll try to be better about posting about our little angels and the exciting things in our life! Here are some pictures. I got a new camera and computer for Christmas so I have to get all the kinks worked out but then lots of pictures to come. unfortunately you can't see how cute our babies are, but if you want to come over they love visitors!!

My parents at our house for Christmas dinner!

Ken and I at temple lights

Ken in his awesome leather cardinal helmet my parents got him

Beautiful nativity scene at the temple

Us at the temple

The star at temple lights!

Ken opening his stocking

me opening presents

Statue of Christ

cool light shot of the temple

beautiful mesa temple

Sutton Diet update!

So I did great on the diet and I noticed a difference and felt pretty good! My tummy didn't like some foods but that's ok. Ken and I decided we hate eggplant- did you know if has weird seeds? gross

We started a new fertility medicine called Femara. It's a medication for breast cancer patients, and has been used to help women with infertility issues ovulate. It has the same desired outcome as clomid but less side effects, which is why my doctors gave it  to me. Things were going well, just a few hot flashes here and there, and then one night I took of my shoes and freaked out. I weighed myself and was shocked. The next day I weighed myself and went in to the doctor and I had gained 15 pounds in about 3 days!

This was the day I went to the doctor for the swelling. They said it was from the medicine but things look ok in blood tests. They also did an ultra sound to see if my ovaries were causing the issue, and an ultrasound of my legs to make sure there were no blood clots. They aren't sure why my body decided to do this, but they said I was in no real danger.

This is my face as I wait for the OB to tell me what's happening. Its pretty swollen, and that's my worried and bored face. There is always lots of waiting at the doctor.

 

And this lovely picture below is what my feet look like today.

Yes, my body is more swollen today that a few days ago. I'm going to go back to the doctor on Monday and try to find a solution. We are also trying to decide if we want to do another round of the medicine since it did not work this time- the ultrasound of my ovaries proved nothing happened. We don't want to give up and move right into invitro, but we also don't want to put me or a baby at risk by another reaction, maybe worse the next time. So we are praying about it and moving forward with faith. I have learned that having faith and doing the best you can makes the questions and frustration at the back of my mind and I can focus on peace and moving forward with the knowledge that Heavenly Father hears our prayers and is blessing us in so many ways.

Immorality on the radio?!

On my way to help my friend I had the radio on a popular station that the young women in the ward listen to. I like it and I usually listen to is too, but this morning something awful happened! They do this prank call think where someone nominates a loved one to be pranked. This happens most mornings or something like it around 7-8pm, when most kids are in the car or on the bus on their way to school. Now i know school is out, but this kind of thing happens all year round.... and today I took a careful listen and was MORTIFIED!

You will not believe what I heard. Take a guess, I dare you. And your worst thought of what may have been on probably doesn't even come close! Now I'm not going to tell you the entire details of the call because it was so horrible and super inappropriate! But here is the gist-

Radio personality K was speaking to a mom about her 14 or so year old daughter. K was egging the mom on saying that this daughter has signed up to receive a tattoo. Honestly I don't know why these people don't just hang up when they can tell someone is being rude and totally pranking, but for whatever reason they don't. And K was claiming this young girl wanted an inappropriate tattoo on her inner thigh for very inappropriate reasons, and then to further prove her point K started making all kinds of super inappropriate sounds. K was claiming that this young girl wanted a tattoo to attract immoral behavior and then added horrible sounds on top of it. And I quickly changed the station.

I only listened to this station for 5 seconds before I was able to get to the button to change the channel, and I hear ALL that, in like 5 seconds! What kind of person does this and claims that someones child is sexually active and then makes fun of something completely sacred?

I'm trying to find the web page with details so I can call and complain about how inappropriate that is. And I know they will probably say "well you don't have to listen", but when you are scanning channels like I was and you hear that, its completely inappropriate and no one should have to listen to that garbage, let alone children or the wonderful youth in our ward! I've gotten extremely cautious and listening closely to things in preparation for our foster kids and for one day when we have our children. I'm 99% positive it was on 101.5 jamz with lady la but I can't find the sound bite. If you fine it let me know so I can call in!

My friend and I were talking just yesterday about how sweet and special the spirits are of children, and how sensitive they are to the corruption in the world, in tv shows, music, all kinds of media and they often perceive the negative things that we as adults seem to just tune out and pass over. But these negative things affect our children's spirits, and what does that say about us if we disregard it? Or if we are so used to it that it seems acceptable.

In my marriage and family class at BYU our teacher challenged us to go free of all media and entertainment that isn't conference talks and mo-tab performances for 3 weeks, and record our feelings in our journals. Then after 3 weeks go back to our normal habits and see if we notice a difference. Ken and I did this challenge a few months ago for a week, and it was really hard but we definitely noticed a difference  in our home and our attitudes and even our relationship. It was definitely hard but was very eye opening.

I'm not saying that everyone needs to listen to what I think is appropriate but I do think that our society needs to put a higher priority on morals. And I also think that things that are so blatantly vile should be stopped and that people need to take a stand. I also know that sexual relations are sacred and should be treated as such. It's so disappointing to hear such rude and inappropriate things on public radio.

Have you ever had to make a stand like this? What do you do to keep the media your family uses appropriate? What are some of your favorite radio stations that you don't have to worry about somethings so awful happening?

Sutton Diet Plan

For this diet I've done a lot of research and talked to several people about their diets and what works for them. My diet is a compilation of all of these and my own personal beliefs and ideas.

I believe in the Word of Wisdom which was a commandment from the Lord that is a code of health that if we follow, we are promised blessings.

Doctrine and Covenants 89:7-21

7 And, again, ^astrong drinks are not for the belly, but for the washing of your bodies. And again, tobacco is not for the ^abody, neither for the belly, and is not good for man, but is an herb for bruises and all sick cattle, to be used with judgment and skill. And again, hot drinks are not for the body or belly.  And again, verily I say unto you, all wholesome ^aherbs God hath ordained for the constitution, nature, and use of man— Every herb in the season thereof, and every fruit in the season thereof; all these to be used with ^aprudence and ^bthanksgiving. Yea, ^aflesh also of ^bbeasts and of the fowls of the air, I, the Lord, have ordained for the use of man with thanksgiving; nevertheless they are to be used ^csparingly; And it is pleasing unto me that they should not be ^aused, only in times of winter, or of cold, or ^bfamine. All ^agrain is ordained for the use of man and of beasts, to be the staff of life, not only for man but for the beasts of the field, and the fowls of heaven, and all wild animals that run or creep on the earth; And ^athese hath God made for the use of man only in times of famine and excess of hunger. All grain is good for the ^afood of man; as also the ^bfruit of the vine; that which yieldeth fruit, whether in the ground or above the ground—Nevertheless, wheat for man, and corn for the ox, and oats for the horse, and rye for the fowls and for swine, and for all beasts of the field, and barley for all useful animals, and for mild drinks, as also other grain.  And all saints who remember to keep and do these sayings, walking in obedience to the commandments, ^ashall receive ^bhealth in their navel and marrow to their bones; And shall ^afind ^bwisdom and great ^ctreasures of ^dknowledge, even hidden treasures; And shall ^arun and not be ^bweary, and shall walk and not faint.  And I, the Lord, give unto them a promise, that the ^adestroying angel shall ^bpass by them, as the children of Israel, and not slay them. Amen.

 

So that's basically my diet right there. Some people like the diets that are meat based, others only want to eat vegetables and no meat. I believe the above passage to be the word of God and I am basing my diet off of what He says.

 

My doctors say no yeast, no sugar, no processed foods, no soda.

 

Its basically this: no processed foods, no sugar, fruits and veggies with grains and meat on occasion, and no yeast because my body does not do well with it.

 

Food to eat:

Grains:

rice

oats

(I'm not eating much wheat because it usually has yeast in it)

 

Fruits:

all

 

Veggies:

all, especially leafy greens

Spaghetti squash is a great substitute for noodles

 

Meat:

mostly fish and chicken

(red meat doesn't make me feel very well)

 

Dairy:

only plain yogurt- especially ones with probiotics!

(I'm lactose intolerant and my body needs a break)

Almond milk is my milk substitute

 

Nuts:

I have some almond slices in my granola but yeast free diets recommend staying away from all nuts so I'm compromising with the almonds 

 

Drinks:

water

 

Sweetener:

honey- in smallll amounts

 

Condiments:

coconut oil

olive oil

ranch dressing- this is my one compromise

All other condiments usually have sugar or yeast

 

Dessert:

homemade fruit Popsicles

 

 

Sutton Diet

Some of you may have noticed that I've been getting a bit roundy all over, and no it's not from a baby. All the hormones in my body are freaking out as I'm trying to have a baby, and my body is starting to show the internal war it's been fighting on the outside.

I'm tired of going to the doctors and taking medicine and working really hard to be healthy so I can get pregnant, with no results. And to top it off, I'm swelling up. Like a lot, and its embarrassing. So I talked to several doctors about this annoying phenomenon and they are a bit puzzled. They've all told me it's from the hormones and it's to be expected. But I don't like that answer. My acupuncturist said that I probably have an infection in my gut, and my family practice doctor thinks that sugar is the cause of all illnesses. These events and ideas have prompted me to invent a diet that will help me loose the weird blubber that I seem to be attracting, and get my body in peak condition to grow a baby.

One doctor recommended a version of the Paleo diet. Emily has been doing this diet for about 2 months now and has lost 45 pounds! Great job Emily! But some things I don't agree with on the diet, or I notice make me feel sick or if I don't have make me feel sick. So I've been doing a lot of experimenting to find the right foods that will help me feel my best self. I don't want to be a skinny stick, I just want to be healthy, and gaining about a pound a day for no reason doesn't seem healthy so I'm doing something about it. right not.

Have you ever watched those documentaries on netflix about juicing, or curing cancer from eating vegan or raw or to loosing weight on a McDonald's diet? Well I've watched allllll of them and have laughed a lot, and learned some interesting things. So here is my version of one of those diet experiments, maybe someday it will be a netflix original series!!!

Also please understand this is very embarrassing and has never happened to me before. I've never been chunky and I have no idea what happened. Also this isn't just me not eating right, I've gained 30 pounds in 3-4 months, something is definitely wrong. This experiment is being monitored by my doctor, and I may not see the huge results I'm hoping for due to the hormones in my body going crazy and the addition of hormones from my fertility treatment. So please as you read and follow my journey, be supportive and encouraging, and leave all judgemental rudeness at home.

Day 1:
Here is what I look like today

I weigh: 162lbs
I fit in size 10 clothes- I HATE things being tight on my stomach, so I really would be about an 8 if I wore clothes that fit snugly on my waist.







My fibromyalgia is ok today, but I've heard the first 48 hours of a major healthy overhaul eating plan make you a little sick and your tummy clears and tries to figure out how to work at optimum.


I ate today:
gluten free cereal, no sugar
almond milk
carrots
applesauce
plain yogurt with a few nuts and coconut shreds
apple with peanut butter


More foods that I can and cannot eat, exercise plan, and details about how I'm going to get healthy to come on the next post!


So here goes!!! Sutton Diet Experiment is underway!

Moving Forward with Faith

This is Elder Jeffery R Holland. He is one of the 12 apostles and I love this talk. It is about going forward with the faith we have and building on that. I love hearing his testimony and applying these teachings in my life. I loved the message and the spirit I felt and thought I should share it with you.

As I've been waiting to have a baby and for our foster children to come I have had to press forward with faith. Having faith and hope in the future helps me to deal with the sadness of the present. I know that we are doing everything we can and are doing our very best. I know the Lord is always there and hears my prayers and is giving me countless blessings each day. I love having the Gospel in my life and having a prophet and apostles to lead and guide us each day.

If you would like to watch other talks from the April 2013 General Conference, just go to lds.org

Inspired Compassion

I was reflecting on the wonderful women in my family. My grandmother always shows me such compassion, and I don't even think she realizes it. She always says the right thing, or holds my hand when I need it or hugs me when I cry and just listens. I love that she understands so much, and that she shows everyone around her such love and patience when her whole life very few people have done the same for her.

My nana does so much for all of her children and grandchildren. I remember when I was around 5 in colorado, and one day I wasn't happy with something my mom or dad did, like put me in time out or something. So I ran to the sidewalk in front of our house and called out "Nana, Nana come get me. Nana I miss you come save me." I knew she lived over the rockies and I had learned about echos and I knew in my little heart that she would hear me. Of course she couldn't, but I still remember how I knew Nana would make me happy.

My mom made my amazing bouquet and the stunning birdcage cake at our wedding. It is so nice to have something she made decorate our home now and remind me of getting married to my handsome ken!

And my mother in law is always so supportive and encouraging. She often brings us veggies from her garden that are so beautiful and it means so much to me and I don't even think she knows how special that is. She is also always ready to help at a moments notice, even if it isn't convenient for her. I never even have to ask for help because she is always the first to offer.


Do you have wonderful women in your life who seem to do the right thing and say the right thing, and it really impacts you deeply and is just what you needed at that moment? I have amazing women in my life who do just that. I believe it's inspired compassion. They probably don't realize that an extra hug or a simple comment is the healing balm that I needed that very moment.

And the other women in my family also reach out to friends and family in need. It's wonderful to hear from them how everyone is doing and who needs what. My in laws are a strong network of compassion.


I've heard it said that often the Lord answers our prayers through another person. And I believe that's why we have families. Even if I'm not having a trial in my life at that time, it's wonderful to have that extra word of encouragement or idea to help me achieve my goals, or maybe set new ones. And it's nice to be able to serve and respond to those subtle promptings to call someone or drop by. It's very exciting to be able to be a handmaiden to our Heavenly Father by helping serve his daughters. That's why I love the visiting teaching program in our church. We are assigned a companion to go with, and we meet together with 2 or 3 assigned women in our church and give them a lesson out of the church monthly magazine, check in to see how they are doing, and offer assistance in any way we can.

I have felt that through the visiting teaching program I am often more blessed and feel a great comfort by serving others. I look forward to these monthly visits and often go more than once a month. It's wonderful to develop friendships with these women and be able to offer aid and comfort because you are friends and can easily notice when something is needed, or ask for help yourself.

I've been helping one of the young women at church feel better about herself with self confidence. I told her how I used to worry about being too fat or not pretty enough, but every morning I would get myself all dressed and put makeup on and then tell myself I was beautiful. Then I spent the rest of each day trying to give others a boost of their self confidence by telling them the truth- how cute that blazer looked or how beautiful they are or how I love being around them because they are so nice. Eventually it worked and my own self confidence was enough so that I didn't worry about myself anymore but could use my confidence to help others.

I haven't done that as much lately because I stay home and don't see a ton of people like I used to each day in high school, but it is still my goal and I've noticed that when I stop thinking about myself and instead find ways to help serve others, even if it's just by what I say to them, that I feel so much better.

Who are the people in your life that have helped you? How do you find ways to serve others daily? I love my family and am so grateful that I have so many amazing women to teach and guide me, and that I have the opportunity to teach and strengthen them as well.

You Should

I've been thinking a lot lately about why I don't care for interacting with certain people or why sometimes my closest allies sometimes irritate me the most. And as I was pondering this frustration and hurt, I realized the problem, and that I too am a culprit.

You should. Those are two words put together that I absolutely cannot stand. I hate hate hate when people tell other people, particularly myself, that I SHOULD be doing something, and here's the biggest part, when I don't ask for their advice or opinion.

Yes checkout lady at the store, my hair is sticking out all wonky and I should think about doing it differently, but hey, it's walmart, people don't come here to show off, they go to tarjay. duh. (just kidding, but sometimes I totally know what those checkout ladies are thinking!)


And yes, I realized I TOTALLY do this to! To people I love, to people I don't really even know! How rude is that! and yes I really do not care for when a stranger tells me what I should be doing. oh really madame in your mercedes? I should be parking less close to the line so you don't worry about scratches on your car? well guess what, I'm in my lines, and yes ladies and gentlemen, I kept right on walking!

Anyway I've realized that its super prevalent in our society that we like to tell one another how to live our lives. and why do we feel we have this right? maybe it's because we care about that person and want to see them happier or looking cuter or maybe we see that they are having certain problems because they are causing them all by themselves. But even those situations when we really could be changing someones life, if they haven't asked for your opinion or your help, it means they aren't ready to change. and that is most definitely the hardest one for me, I hate to see people struggling when they could just adjust one minor thing and have their world a totally different place.

When I got divorced everyone kept telling me I should go to counselling and that I should not go to the singles ward or that I should get married tomorrow or I'd end up a spinster. But I went to counselling when I was ready, and yes, it was life changing, but only because I was ready. And I went to the singles ward when I felt ready, and got married when the time was right, and it just so happens my husband is the best thing to ever happen to me. I know we all mean well when we tell someone that they should do this or they should do that. but chances are they already know what they should be doing, and they are working on their own timetable with God on getting there.

But, you may be thinking, I KNOW there are times when I should "You Should" someone. Yes, there are most definitely times. I think those times are when someone asks us what we think they should be doing, when they really are asking for our help and opinions. And in those instances, our you should's need to come from a place of love and gentleness, because when a "you should" like that is needed, it's often needed when we are at our weakest and most vulnerable.

And then there are the times when we all need to "You Should" someone when really we want to yell at them "YOU NEED", but that would be rude so we use you should in a manner to tell someone off in the most loving way possible. Examples, when someone is crossing boundaries you or your family has set, and they know better. Then it is perfectly acceptable to tell them that they should back off, or stop or whatever it is you need to say to get them to be respectful to boundaries.

Also when someone is a total stranger and they are doing something completely inappropriate, like touching your baby's hand in the supermarket. While it's the normal momma bear thing to want to scream that they need to back 10 feet away immediately and provide 10 bottles of hand sanitizer as an apology, the most polite thing we can say is "you should stop touching my child please" or "lady, you should back off slowly before I start blowing my rape whistle", whichever floats your boat.

And sometimes we you should someone when they complain and complain and complain. Don't get me wrong, we ALL need that friend that we can dump our complaints on when they just listen and don't tell us how to solve our problems, and then after you get it all out it's your turn to listen to their complaints and then you both move on, feeling happier someone listened and understood and that problem that seemed so worthy of a complaint now seems so easy to tackle, all because you got the feelings out of the way of the situation and can now approach it with more strength and zeal. But if you aren't that kind of friend, complaining endlessly is inappropriate and unacceptable. It takes a special friend to be your understandable complainer listener to. You know, that one special friend. and their occasional you should is acceptable because usually it consists of " you should totally take allll your coupons and your largest shopping list to that clerk that gave you the stink eye and make them scan each coupon and read you the final price!" as you laugh at the wonderful thought of sweet revenge on that walmart clerk that dared give you the stink eye.
                   Yes, we all need that friend.

And something I've had to learn the hard way is that instead of saying "we should" or "you should" like if the person doesn't the world will fall apart, we must say things in a loving, supportive, openly patient sort of way.

That way we can build off of one anothers ideas and strengths and really listen to their opinions and ideas, because honestly those are what really matter, when it comes to their life. Instead of saying "We should do this and this because you should have done this and that and so now we have to do this", we could say "what do you think about this activity or idea, what do you think about that saying or that color". Then we show that we really love the person and we want them to succeed in their endeavors or their life. Its a much better way to convey how we feel about them.

And when we see those strangers who we really think should not be wearing flip flops and knee high socks, we must smile and continue walking.

So Grateful

Today I had the amazing opportunity to sing at a wonderful woman's funeral. I was able to stay with her for two weeks last year when I first met Ken and moved into the singles ward. Her name is Joyce Lee. She was so sweet and fun! She was so nice and always complimented me on my outfits and asked how my different dates were. When I would come home from one and tell her how it went she gave me the best advice and told me to give that guy another try or definitely stay away from that one. She also loved grilled cheese sandwiches. Her funeral was so beautiful, and I loved singing in her memory. Her grandson Adam played for me and we did How Great Thou Art. It was so beautiful.

While I was there I kept thinking  about what an amazing husband and family I have. I am so grateful that we have the plan of happiness and know where we come from, why we are here, and where we are going. I just had this overwhelming feeling of gratitude. I am so grateful for my wonderful husband. He really is the best kind of man. And I don't know why Heavenly Father blessed me with him but I am so grateful that He did. He is so supportive and loving and brave and strong and we are so happy together. Did you ever imagine life could be this wonderful? Well let me tell you, it can!!

And I am so grateful that our family can be together forever! Ken and I get to be sealed for time and allllll eternity in 6 months! ahhh I am soooooo excited!!! And we are so lucky to have such wonderful families with all their craziness and commotion. They are so supportive and encouraging and we are so lucky to have the Gospel of Jesus Christ in our lives and that we have the plan of happiness. I am so grateful to know that our Heavenly Father loves us and has sent us here to get a body and learn and grow, and then sent a Savior to provide an atonement so that we can live with our Father in Heaven and families again after this life.

We are so blessed and I am so grateful to have such a wonderful life. I know things are really hard sometimes with trials and our bodies not cooperating and worrying about the future but it's so nice to know that there is a bigger picture and that the Lord knows each and every one of us. I went to a huge concert the other night and I loved knowing that with all those thousands of people the Lord knows each of us individually, that he hears our prayers, and that He gives us all the blessings He can.

We are so blessed to know such amazing truths and to have each other. I love my amazing husband and am so happy that we are at the beginning of a super long and awesome eternal road together. I know that may sound long, but it sounds perfect to me.

Yummy foods lately

I've made some yummy things lately! Cream cheese sugar cookies, caramel apples, homemade chocolates, chocolate covered strawberries, and my own recipe of caramel for chocolate caramels but it turned into toffee so I'm going to make toffee cupcakes tomorrow! I also made homemade red sauce, meatballs, and sweet potato stuffed shells with Alfredo sauce! Message me if you would like any recipes!

meatballs and sauce

caramels

lemon and orange chocolate creams

sweet potato stuffed shells

Dog Bite

Isn't his little tounge so cute!!!So I've been on an animals resuce kick, and rescued 2 animals in one day. The First was a baby kitten, he was running across the street with 6 lanes of traffic!!!! So I pulled over, and so did a policeman. The kitty ran up into my wheel well and up into the engine, so I popped the hood and there he was! He had a blistered paw that had burst, probably from the hot tar. His eyes were goopy and his nose runny. So I took him to the vet and they said to take him to the animal shelter where he would get free care. It was so sad to see him go but he will get adopted really fast and get all better!
         
 I named him George Washington for his bravery crossing the dangerous road!

So then I went to my friend Danyelle's house and there was this super puffy looking dog walking around. I almost kept driving then I decided to turn around and investigate. He was so matted and dirty that he looked like a mangled mop. I decided to take him home! well not to my home but to danyelle's because she knows what to do with this sort of thing. So I brought him to her and we tried to cut out the mats. I accidentally cut his skin but all he did was make a tiny noise then let us keep going. It was as if he was used to grooming. And he was so sweet and so well behaved that I thought for sure we could keep him. But then we couldn't get anywhere with his fur and no grooming place would take him and it would cost like $100 just to get him groomed let alone his shots and stuff. So Danyelle said we could leave him in the backyard. I had to take my mom to the Dr the next day so Ken went to get the doggie and take him to the shelter. Well he did great with ken but then as he went to grab the dog, the dog bit him! Can you believe it? This same dog that let me groom him, or at least try to, and pick him up and put him in the car and get him out of the car. But one hand on him to get him in the cage from Ken, and that was it.

So here are some pictures of ken. One is his left hand, and the other is his right. We took him to urgent care and his hand was so huge!! It's doing better now, and I'm not allowed to rescue any more animals. Dannyelle is amazing and I'm so grateful she helped me even though I was being a bit silly.

Fertility

It seems like almost EVERYONE struggles with some kind of fertility issues when they decide it's the right time to have a baby. So here's our story. I've had endometriosis for 10 years. Mine is a severe painful case, and the several OB's I've seen have said to just hang in there, when you are ready to have a baby we will make it happen.

 I had surgery a few years ago to laser all of the endometrial implants out, they are basically blood blister tumors that grow where they shouldn't. Mine grow around my uterus and I have been very blessed that although they cause extreme pain they have not grown on my ovaries. Last week I had an HSG test done, where they inject you with dye and look at your uterus and tubes. It is a totally miracle that mine look wonderful and are completely scar tissue free.

My OB is being extremely aggressive in figuring out why I haven't been able to gt pregnant, and why the pain is so severe, and how to avoid having a hysterectomy because everything is so bad in there. She has been amazing. We did all the other tests you can think of, and I have one more next week. Everything is looking good, except for the obvious endometriosis issue.

We decided to do the Lupron shot back in October which is supposed to kill off all the endometrial implants and give me a clean slate and the best chance to get pregnant. My endometriosis is now growing back with a vengeance no one expected, so my Doctor is rushing to get a baby in there and stop the growth.

Endometriosis grows out of control when you have your monthly period. The rate of growth is not parallel to the level of pain, so although my pain has increased, ( which I didn't think possible, apparently there is a level 15 on the pain scale of 10) but we don't know how many tumors are present. It is a huge blessing there is no scar tissue on the fallopian tubes and despite the tumors, as long as those are clear I have a better shot of conceiving.

The Lupron shot did some very interesting things. I got to experience menopause 20 or so years early, and it made walking very difficult on some days. We couldn't figure out why, and I spent thousands on acupuncture and tests and doctors visits to figure out why walking was painful. We discovered that I have fibromyalgia, which is an autoimmune disease. I take an awesome medicine that signals the nerves in my spine to calm down and now my pain is basically non existent. My endometriosis pain is still present but I can take ibuprofen and be ok with a heating pad lunch break. We have been very blessed finding the major source for my pain to be the fibromyalgia and with the new medicine I'm a new person!

But having a baby is still not happening. So we will do more tests and figure out what other medicines to try to move it along. Since my tubes are clear now we have a small window for success before the endometriosis grows out of control. So it may be a while and another surgery or two before we have a baby but my pain is under control, I have an amazing husband, and I'm trying to stay positive in other ways.

I started reading a book about understanding fertility and it was very frightening telling me all the ways endometriosis inhibits getting pregnant or how I'm likely to lose the baby if I miraculously conceive. But I know we are supposed to be parents and if I listen to the statistics and what could go wrong I will be discouraged and stressed and that doesn't help anything.

For now I'm furthering my candy and baked goods skills and inventing my own recipes. I am looking for great deals on baby things for when the time comes that we get our own! And I love holding my friends babies and helping them with struggles they may be going through. It's good to stay busy and to know that we are doing as much as we can in partnership with the Doctor and specialist and hopefully soon we can have a baby and keep it safe inside me!

I've really enjoyed recognizing the many blessings the Lord has given me. It's been so fun to set goals and learn new things. I've even written a primary song! and it's been so wonderful to continue to enjoy being married and having a fabulous husband. We have been so blessed and this is a trial that we will get through and we are staying positive and enjoying life despite the long wait for a baby. I've learned to not give up or be sad, there is so much to enjoy in life. And some day we will be parents, we might have to adopt but that would still be wonderful!

If you or someone you know struggles with fertility issues don't give up or get discouraged. Having the best doctors and specialists helps give you peace of mind, and staying busy and doing things that are fun and that you look forward to give you joy and hope in your life.

Park City Honeymoon

We went to Park City last week for our honeymoon! It was so so SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO fun!!!! Our resort had 6 hot tubs! and our apartment had a fire that you just flip the switch to turn it on! I thought that was brilliant and would have loved to have one of those in Maine!! it was amazing!

We went to the thrift shops/DI's and got lots of books! and we went to Tocano's, an all you can eat sushi place, and this other little place where we got the most amazing stuffed pasta! ( It had sweet potatoes and cheese inside covered in white sauce. AMAZING!!!)

Ken and Fallon, and Fallon in a nest

Baby Zurrie! Such a cute elephant!!

So full after all you can eat Sushi!!!                                      

 We went to the temple twice. First we did sealings, then we did a session!!!

 Me and baby Daxton!!

 

 At the Zoo!

 BYU steps! These used to plague me so much! But look how beautiful they are!!!

 More BYU landscape

 At the honors library in the Maeser building

Me pretending to be a Tucan at Tucano's

More Temple Pictures! From our first visit there

At a fancy pizza place, the pizza was kind of gross though...

At the zoo! Brittany, me, Ken and Fallon

Ryan and baby Daxton!

In downtown park city, I was trying to be a bhuda statue, like the one behind me, but I peeked!

Awesome ski man at some shop

Awesome crazy alien dude in a tank, pretty cool art

We had a great time and ate lots of new foods and got to see wonderful friends!!!! It was amazing to go to the temple and know that families can be together forever! I love the gospel and my wonderful husband. It was such a fabulous expereince!!